My name is Marie and I am a recovering depressed person. That is the best way I can think to put it. I am sharing my story so I can assist others that have suffered as I did so they can find alternate methods of treating their depression other than the medications that are currently the primary method.

I came to Dr. Boyadjis’ office maybe three months ago. I had endured a year of treatment with traditional medication and I could not even do psychotherapy because my level of depression was so severe I could not talk. I spent the better part of that year in a chair unable to do much of anything except occasionally get dressed and shower and go to the grocery store with my husband. Literally I lived for a year in hell. I was suicidal – I was in so much pain that I can’t even begin to tell you the suffering. Unfortunately and sadly, most people do not understand the suffering that one feels when they go through depression. They are just expected to snap out of it. People don’t understand that it is a brain disease and a life threatening one at that.

My husband was fortunate enough to get counsel from my primary doctor was concerned about my current state and feared they would lose me. She told my husband I had no quality of life at all. I am 58 years old and I was a vibrant and passionate nurse. I worked every year since 1975 fighting depression but never to this degree.

My doctor referred us to Dr. Boyadjis and I walked into the office not expecting anything but for my husband to spend more money on a hopeless case. The day I arrived at his office, I took a depression test where I fell down at the lowest of the scores for being the most depressed. Dr. Boyadjis talked with me and my husband and I barely heard what he was saying. I was there trying to just comprehend and focus and luckily my husband was listening intently. Dr. Boyadjis spent about two hours with us that day and I did ask some questions. The truth is; I didn’t really believe this treatment was going to make any difference in this deep dark place my spirit had gone to. My husband insisted I have the treatment but I was very reluctant because of my doubts and the price. He had watched me suffer and he had suffered for that year before and he wanted his wife back.

The procedure took six weeks and I wasn’t really nervous about it because at the point when I walked in the door to receive treatment I was just a shell and didn’t really care if it hurt or not. The staff took good care of me. The actual stimulation sounds a little like a dart gun and it feels like a woodpecker sitting on your head. It is initially a little uncomfortable but after awhile I actually looked forward to it. Maybe because I noticed something was changing in me.

When I first came in for treatments, I was so negative. My anxiety was overwhelming. This went on for a couple weeks. At approximately week three, the depression started lifting a little bit and I started having conversations about things other than myself. By the end of the final week, I was a different person. Everyone I knew didn’t know what was going on. For a year I was walking around like a zombie and suddenly I was back to being Marie again. I am now able to live. Thank you to Dr. Boyadjis, Jen, the inventor of this wonderful technology, and the manufacturer of this product, Neuronetics, for saving my life. I really do not know how you say thank you for that except to go on and live a happy and successful life and that is what I plan to do.

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